When Life Really Hurts
Sometimes, when life really hurts, finding comfort can feel like an impossibility. When something happens that can’t be fixed, like a loved one dying, the grief can be all-consuming. Unexpected tribulations such as losing your job, an intimate betrayal, or serious illness can leave you feeling helpless and alone. It’s natural to question how God could let these things happen. Even if you realize your pain is the consequence of an action and not God’s doing, the pain is real.
Intense emotional distress can wreak havoc in your life. Fatigue, headaches, nausea, loss of appetite, foggy thinking, etc. are common side effects of emotional pain. It can even be too difficult to sort your thoughts out enough to know how to pray for help. God understands, and the Holy Spirit is there to intercede on our behalf.
“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:26-28, ESV).
Waiting for Comfort
It’s easier to be patient when you know what you’re waiting for is coming. When you’re really hungry, you want to eat right now. However, after ordering in a restaurant, you can politely and quietly wait because you know you’ll have food soon. You have faith that the server wrote down your order correctly and gave it to the cook. You have faith the cook will prepare the food properly and the server will bring it to your table. If we can have that much faith in a stranger, why can’t we have faith in God, who loves us?
If you get a headache, you take an over-the-counter pain reliever and, if possible, sit quietly until it passes. You don’t yell, cry, and complain until it goes away because you know relief is coming. A toddler may cry until it goes away because she doesn’t understand what is happening or when it will end. A toddler has not yet learned the patience that comes with faith. This is how we sometimes behave when we ask God for help. We complain he doesn’t do it as fast or in the manner we think best.
Ordering food and taking a pill are measures we initiate ourselves to bring comfort. Praying for God to help us through discomfort is handing over control. Do we think we can do it better than God? Do we doubt his infinite power? Are we not convinced he honors his Word in Scripture? Why do we put faith in ourselves, God’s creation, and not the Creator?
Building Faith to Find Comfort
As a child grows and recovers from childhood sicknesses and minor injuries, he learns to trust his caretakers’ first-aid abilities. He develops faith that when he’s told a medicine or treatment will make him well, it will do just that. Likewise, the caretakers provide the child with increasing responsibility to learn what can be entrusted to him. The more opportunities that demonstrate trust, the greater the faith grows for child and caretaker.
This is why new believers are referred to as “Baby Christians.” Their age doesn’t matter. They have to go through faith-building trials to learn what God will do for them. “But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it” (1 Corinthians 3:1-2, ESV). Little lessons every day build faith gradually. A big test, something you cannot handle, will build great faith, but it may not happen instantaneously.
It’s hard to see that God is doing anything when you’re collapsing under the chaos of extreme emotional pain. When innocent people get hurt, it’s hard to make sense of anything. But if you trust God to make beauty from the ashes, you’ll come out the other side faithful and strong. You’ll be able to look back and see God’s hand was in it every step of the way.
Faith in God = Finding Comfort
I don’t mean to imply blind faith is easy. Of course it isn’t. Imperfect humans with their own selfish agendas have taught us all to depend on ourselves and not others. But God is not an imperfect human. He allows us to go through struggles to make us stronger. Working out with weights is hard, but the more you do it, the stronger you become. “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11, ESV). Keep the faith.
While struggling and unable to find comfort, patience is hard when all you can do is wait. “But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31, ESV). God promises to get you through it. He does not agree to run his plans by you first. If he created the universe and everything in it, he can handle your problems without your input.
So whatever you’re going through, know that you are not alone – ever! If you keep the faith and wait on the Lord, your pain will ease. Acknowledging that God knows more than you and he moves without your understanding is a great step in faith that will be rewarded. “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9, ESV).
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