Messed Up

A child being bullied at school who’s told, “It’s just part of being a kid,” may feel a double negative effect. One from the bullying, and the other from being told she’s overreacting. Maybe the child is misconstruing the situation. Maybe the bully wants to be friends but lacks social skills. Or maybe the bully is intentionally threatening her and causing her as much emotional and psychological distress as possible. When others minimize her fear and torment, they cause her to feel like she doesn’t matter.

It may not even be that people dismiss others’ pain out of indifference. Life has become a non-stop rat race. Everyone is dealing with their own problems. People’s lives have become so chaotic that it takes effort to see beyond your own world. This is a problem.

Scripture tells us to help each other. “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing,” (1 Thessalonians 5:11, ESV). And the Golden Rule everyone has heard, “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them,” Luke 6:31, ESV). We have to help each other.

Messed Up Schedules

Everything is so expensive these days, and technology expenses are something we didn’t have when I was a kid. Now, on top of housing, food, utilities, and transportation, we have cell phones, internet, computers, tablets, streaming services, etc. And if you have kids, you’re constantly paying for some extracurricular, medical service, clothes, and so on. With all these expenses, everyone is working all the time to pay all these bills. With all that work, everyone is tired and stressed. Being mentally and physically exhausted all the time makes it difficult to focus on or even notice anything else.

So, everyone is busy, stressed, and dealing with their own struggles. Everyone is essentially wandering around in the dark with the same issues and needs. Instead of bumping into each other and getting more frustrated, can’t we all help each other? Let’s say a group of people are all trying to get around a large branch in the road. The branch is covering the road and too large for one person to move. Wouldn’t it make sense for everyone to move the branch together? That way, everyone participates, and everyone achieves their goal in less time than doing it alone.

Everyone I talk to is so busy they don’t know if they’re coming or going. And, let’s be honest, when someone slows us down, we get impatient and angry. When life is too chaotic to slow down for a few minutes, efficiency and quality are lost. Slowing down makes sense. We need to clean up our messed-up schedules. I used to think the expression, “Stop and smell the roses,” was just about appreciating things. But, when you take the time to appreciate things, your mind and body respond positively. When your mind and body are healthy, productivity increases.

Secretly Messed Up

There are events society deems worthy of calling trauma, e.g., military combat, rape, brutal attack. However, trauma also results from repeated occurrences like years of verbal and psychological abuse. How about sexual abuse from someone who “loves” you? This abuse causes the victim to question everything they know and think. An unhealthy mind can’t always see what the problem is or the solution. Someone looking at this situation objectively might say, “Stay away from them.” But that may not be possible. What if it’s a parent or a spouse the victim depends on? What if the victim believes the lies?

Oftentimes, the victim is aware of the problem, but they’re afraid to do anything about it. People who intentionally abuse others don’t want to be exposed. For this reason, they’re good at controlling their victim. The victim understands that telling anyone or trying to get away will have worse consequences than the current abuse. Does that not sound traumatic?

Being trapped in an unbearable situation can cause people to snap and do unspeakable things. Many people kill themselves because they don’t know how to stop their suffering. This is not a personal problem. This is a societal problem. People need to notice signs in others who are hurting. Someone who’s life is so messed up they don’t know what to do, and they fear doing anything, need help. It costs nothing and takes little time to ask someone if they’re okay. Simply letting someone know their life is valuable could be the difference between their life or death.

Talk

If you’re hurting, there is someone who can help. If no one is listening to you, call a crisis line. Even if you believe you’re not worth someone’s time, talk to someone, because that belief, is not okay. Telling someone what you’re going through can be scary, but it’s necessary to get help. Everyone deserves to be safe and happy. “The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble,” (Psalm 9:9, ESV).

Talk to someone you notice is struggling. An article on the NAMI.org website, Warning Signs and Symptoms, lists possible signs of someone in distress. A few indicators include a change in mood or behavior, isolating, overuse of drugs/alcohol, confusion, and ailments without obvious cause. You would want someone to help you or someone you love. Let’s all help each other in this messed up world.

Below are several help lines to reach out to. Don’t keep it bottled up. Talk to someone.

Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988 (Call or Text)

Teen Hope Line: 877-870-4673 (Call or Text)

SAMHSA National Help Line: 800-662-4357 (Call) or 435748 (Text)

Page of help line contact info: https://findahelpline.com/us

Relax to Linda’s Serenity Christian Meditations podcast.

Find self-hypnosis and meditation mp3s to download in the Serenity Christian Hypnosis Store.