Mistakes

So Many Mistakes

Some errors are accidental, and some are done out of rebellion, but all have consequences and teaching attributes. For example, I am number four in my sibling order, and I learned a lot of things I shouldn’t do by watching my older brothers. I was taught through bad example. I observed that when my brothers stayed out after curfew the doors were locked and they couldn’t get in the house. So, I learned to keep my bedroom window unlocked when I went out. Sorry, Mom.

Other object lessons have taught me that screaming at someone to calm down does not work. In fact, the louder you scream, the less calm the person becomes. If you want someone to be calm, you must be calm first. And I only needed to make the mistake of reacting badly to one of my kids’ injuries once. When you’re calm, they are calm.

Defying the Mistake

Speaking for myself, there are mistakes I tend to simply defy because…I have no idea why I do this. In case you didn’t know, standing on a rocking chair to reach something up high is very likely to end badly. Even after dozens of hangovers, many people still choose to drink too much. Eating a bunch of junk food results in junky health, but millions of people still do it day after day. Are we stupid?

I think most people know when they’re about to make a mistake but do it anyway because they think it will be worth the consequences. Other people hope they can change the result. Some people do things absentmindedly or when very preoccupied with other thoughts. “The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it” (Proverbs 22:3, ESV). This Proverb reminds me of a supervisor I had when I worked at a juvenile community corrections facility. He would always tell the kids, “Don’t do stupid stuff,” (I cleaned up the language), but they kept doing stupid stuff, aaannd, they were in jail.

Ignorance is Bliss

Sometimes people don’t realize they’re doing anything wrong. Have you ever suffered through a person singing the wrong lyrics to a good song? Lots of intelligent people do things wrong because they are unaware of rules or misunderstand instructions. People left to figure things out on their own may think they are getting it right but are not. If you don’t know any better, how are you to know what is right?

I remember when I figured out how to use the “Control/Find” feature in my Word documents. I wrote so many papers in my undergrad studies and had to scan through every line looking for a phrase or word. Knowing how to use that handy feature saved me hours of editing time in graduate school. I sure wish I had learned that sooner.

Sometimes another person’s mistake is beneficial, but does that make it right? If you’re given too much change back, is it right to keep it, or do you tell them? I was recently having dinner at Texas Roadhouse when my fiancé told the server it was my birthday. I hesitantly confirmed the claim then told the server I would happily take the complementary birthday dish of ice cream, but she better not bring that saddle near me. She laughed and said that was fine. When she brought the ice cream, she asked me my name. I told her my name is Linda, but she heard Erica. She then asked me what age I wanted to be – yes, what age I wanted to be – so I said twenty-one. She then shouted to the restaurant that her new best friend, Erica, is twenty-one today. I did not correct her.

Admitting the Error

Having to take accountability for mistakes can be scary. We fear that others will think we’re incompetent or not like us. We let the guilt of blame overshadow owning the error. The liability may feel too great to accept.

A corrections worker once told me that he lost his facility keys – yeah, in the correctional facility. Knowing this blunder would cost him his job was the minimum outcome expectation. If an inmate got ahold of the keys, it would be nothing short of a disaster. The corrections worker set out on an intense search, which included reaching his hand inside every toilet. Moments before accepting his fate and letting his supervisor know the keys were missing, the coworker who had taken the keys, gave them back. I asked him if he beat the coworker over the head with the keys. He said the relief of knowing the keys were safe and that no one needed to know he had “lost” them outweighed his anger. He also maintained control of the keys every minute he was on duty after that incident.

Liberating Acceptance

Despite all the possible negative consequences that result from making mistakes, it’s liberating to own and learn from them. We cannot expect God to protect us from the aftermath of our errors regardless of the circumstances, but accepting our actions lifts the weight of trying to hide those actions. Taking responsibility for your mistakes garners respect. None of us is perfect so pretending you never error is disingenuous.

The Bible is full of good people enduring the consequences of their actions. Consequences are not exclusive to the person who made the mistake. Mistakes usually affect other people, animals, and the environment. Remember, the first mistake made in the Garden of Eden brought sin into the entire world. Being forgiven does not negate consequences. “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap” (Galatians 6:7, ESV). After a mistake, all we can do is learn from it and do better.

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